Overcoming Jealousy and Envy: A Guide to Finding Inner Peace
Envy, in a nutshell, is wanting what others have. Jealousy encompasses feelings of insecurity, fear, and envy over a lack of possessions, status, or something of personal value. Both involve comparisons, which reflect feelings of insufficiency.
Adding to this soup of negative emotions is a sense of injustice that the envied person’s advantage is undeserved. And boy, that is a very slippery slope. This combination of inferiority, frustration, and resentment can lead to hostility and passive-aggressive behaviors.
While it’s normal to feel jealous from time to time, it’s important to recognize these feelings and work to overcome them so they don’t control us.
Here are some tips for overcoming jealousy and envy:
- Acknowledge your emotions. The first step in overcoming jealousy and envy is to acknowledge that you are feeling these emotions. Once you recognize them, you can start to work on addressing the root causes and finding ways to overcome them.
- Practice gratitude - no really, do it. Focusing on what we have rather than what we lack can help shift our perspective and reduce feelings of jealousy and envy. Try to focus on what you are grateful for each day, and make a point to appreciate the good things in your life.
- Reframe those damn thoughts. Our thoughts can greatly impact our emotions, so it’s important to work on reframing negative thoughts. Instead of focusing on what others have that you don’t, try to focus on your strengths and accomplishments.
- Seek inspiration, not comparison. Instead of constantly comparing yourself to others, seek inspiration from others’ successes. Use their achievements as motivation to work on your own goals and aspirations.
- Hey you! Practice self-care. Taking care of yourself can help you feel better about yourself and reduce feelings of jealousy and envy. Make time for activities that you enjoy, get enough sleep, and eat a healthy diet.
- Surround yourself with positive people (Why wouldn't you?) Surrounding yourself with positive and supportive people can help boost your confidence and reduce feelings of jealousy and envy. Fade away from the negative, downer-energy people you have collected. Seek out friends and family members who are encouraging and/or hire a life coach or therapist.
Overcoming envy and jealousy begins with awareness, allowing you to see that the projected stories in your mind are not true, and more importantly, are self-defeating. Jealousy can ruin your peace of mind, and relationships, and move success further away from you (and besides, no one wants to hang out with a jealous person). Rather than letting jealousy infect your life, soul, and career, use its emergence as a tool to better understand yourself.
Envy and jealousy are essentially hoping for the failure of another person. Wishing or hoping that people fail is an irrefutable way to invite that sentiment right back onto you. What you project, you will get.
I have noticed throughout my life that jealous, envious people are not only unhappy, but they often fail, and even if they succeed at attaining the things they sought, the jealousy and unhappiness continued somewhere else in their life.
About the author: Elle Russ is a #1 bestselling author, world-renowned thyroid health expert, and master coach.
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